pitched verbal comm

Make It Mine

Sunday, October 19, 2008

It's 8:10 in the morning of a beautiful Sunday with the sun hanging majestically up in the sky. Come to think of it, it has been quite a while since the sun was not overshadowed by the threatening dark clouds.

This is kind of my last post for the blog before I rightly explode during THE big O's. I fear for Chemistry. I fear for Combined Humanities. I fear for Maths. I don't know if I can do well and up to my expectations.

Intended Score
EL: A2
E Maths: A2
A Maths: A2
Chem: B4
Phy: A1
Combined Humanities: B4

Compared to now:
*following that order above*
C5
B3
C6
B4
A2
F9

That is some really fucked-up score, people. I certainly don't want that to fall on me.

I just a dream about her again. I was asking her out to Prom Night, I think. And all she did was wrote a little note in Chinese, so I was having some difficulty to read that note. Apparently, she knows but she doesn't wants me because I'm vulgar and I forgot what else. And at last I read, if we are meant to be, we will be together eventually but then was not the time yet...

And my friends brought me out to dinner to cheer me up and we had a great time! =D

I find myself in a strangely yet familiar position. It's like history repeating itself but now with a different ending. Last two years ago, I was sitting for my exams and those examinations are important as it determines what subjects am I going to take. And there was a girl factor affecting me very much before the exams and also after it. I didn't got the girl, but I got the results. And coincidentally, we are still in the same class.

Now, I'm about to take the O's and I like this girl again. Luckily, it's not the "past-her" that I like anymore, it's the "present her" that I admire. So there's a chance that I might be asking her to come with me on Prom Night.

And hopefully she agrees.

But if she doesn't? I'll still lead my life as normal, grooving to Jason Mraz's music but she'll be the girl who made the most impact on my love life.

Acing O Levels and the girl I like ain't going to be easy tasks, but I'll do anything just to Make it Mine.

Labels: Jason Mraz

Love for a Child

Saturday, October 11, 2008

I guess Life keeps changing, spinning around an axis that doesn't exist at all. I'm like going through a series of cruel advertisements for "Ugly Betty" where the pictures of our friends keep rotating and rotating until it found the right picture. Mine used to stay at a few images that I really love, somehow someone hit the "reset" button and now I'm waiting for the rotations to stop.

My life is similar to the American TV show, Heroes. Not claiming I do indeed have extraordinary strength, but 1 single episode of "Heroes" is equivalent to one day of my life. You see, in a single episode of "Heroes", many things can occur. Similarly, one day of my life, many things can happen. All these culminates into a revolution of life.

Changing for someone is easy but changing for yourself is rather difficult as it's not only yourself that changes, it's your WHOLE life. It takes a huge amount of mental strength change your habits, beliefs and actions or you can mentally drop yourself into a vat of green acid as a threat. But as we all know, the former sounds much more sensible than the latter.

As much as I want my old friends to stay by my side, there's no use in placing myself in a world of delusion that serves as an escapism for me. Reality bites and it bites harder when you try to escape from it. I'm still a Child who's still makes stupid mistakes and hopes to earn forgiveness. But what's the point? Perspectives had changed and it won't bend back to it original state. There's another path to aid you but the path to Salvation won't be an easy journey ahead.

That's why once in a while, we need Love to encourage us to keep hanging on to our lives and also bridge the distance between misunderstood and disheartened buddies. I'm not referring to one person in particular.

*singing*: All I want for Christmas is Love~

Lee, dozing off!

P.S. Though this post may seem discouraging for me but there's no end to my joyfulness to my new life! =D

Labels: Jason Mraz

Details in the Fabric

Thursday, October 02, 2008

I regretted a lot that I didn't bought the pink class t-shirt. I've been obsessed with Jason Mraz's "Geek in the Pink" that I was kind of craving for the pink t-shirt today. Man, I want to jump into that pink shirt and start grooving with the hip-hop rap song.

The shirt definitely looked like it was designed by some homosexual. However, it had the cute factor in it. Wearing class t-shirts kinda bond the class together, but the thought of this made me felt ashamed of myself. I didn't buy the shirt because I thought the colour was gay and it didn't struck me as an iconic design of the year of all class t-shirts. 4/6 had a really brilliant simple design on their shirt and it looks awesome.

Ours looks retarded and too simple for anyone's viewing. Though the design clearly shows no flair of any of our arty students, but it's the wonderful yet bitter memories that are woven into a shirt that depicts the different kind of experiences we had together as a class.

I am an living example of a result of this phenomenon.

Somehow, my name didn't appeared on the shirt due to some *clears throat* kind of printing error. Deep inside me, I was of course furious. Who the hell wouldn't get mad if their name didn't appeared on the class t-shirt. I was part of this class, people! Didn't I made at least a little contribution to our ups and downs in our classroom?!

However, I didn't wanna make a big fuss out of this. Besides, I didn't order any shirt for myself. So I'll be like a hypocrite if I were to shout at the people responsible for this printing mistake. So I didn't exhibit out my rage, only nodding my head to acknowledge the apologies and funny insults that were thrown at me from my classmates. I'm not that petty, you know..

I was devastated that my name didn't appear on the shirt and I didn't know how to react to this situation. Is it a blessing or my karma? After giving much rational thoughts, I realised it was actually a blessing in disguise! How so?

Using what I had told myself the other day, viewing such situations in an optimistic tone can really change one's dampen mood to a joyous one. I chose to see this as a blessing because if my name doesn't appear on it, people will remember me even more as the teenager who was so down on his luck that his name was not woven into the class t-shirt. Years later, when they dig up the shirt from their dusty damp cupboards, they'll realise there's two Faruq's name and the other belonged to someone else.

They may not remember my name but at least they felt my presence. Memories can be easily reminisced just picking up this very pale pink shirt and many memorable images will just fly through your head and who knows, you people may just break into a silly smile on your face. =D

Therefore, all these fragments of vivid colourful recollections are called Details in the Fabric.

Labels: Jason Mraz