pitched verbal comm

Selfish?

Sunday, July 06, 2008

Is it my fault for being too passionate about a performance? In the midst, somehow people's feelings are hurt by your very words and people deemed you as "selfish". Is it selfish if you want to get something done for the same people who has plans of their own? I don't know. I'm in a dilema right now.

If I don't act now, when do I act? On that day itself? It's already too late for adjustments and amendments. Then when we perform, we'll be disappointing a lot of people who put in the effort to make this performance possible for us.

I have been disappointed by some people too. I always don't want to think bad things about them because I know they are my friends and I believe that they have troubles on their own, that's why they can't commit themselves fully to their duties. I always try to justify the actions they do. Why can't some of them put themselves in my shoes?

If I'm selfish, I wouldn't give a damn about this performance. I would probably neglect my duties. I would say "Hey guys it's all right...Just one more week, let's get it over with..". Heck, I wouldn't be here anymore. The motivation that kept pushing me on, is my will. I am willing to sacrifice my time for studies as it's only one week to the concert. I want us to suceed and not play average music with no unity and balance. That's why I keep insisting on extra practices. It's only 1 day of Banding, but there's only one Viva La 5 Concert. Plus it's the FIRST Percussion Ensemble.

I know I shouldn't have said about quitting just because we couldn't get another practice. I'm sorry. But that's not the intention I have in mind. It's much more complicated that you think it is...